37 Weeks

We're full term now!

Looks like Lucy will be here in two weeks. My fluid levels went up another 3 cm, and according to the growth ultrasound measurements, she's clocking in at 8 lbs 3 oz. I know from friends' experiences that this number is generally inaccurate and overblown, but it doesn't make me any less fearful. In regard to the fluid, my OB team and I suspect she's healthy and that the fluid levels could be caused by a late onset gestational diabetes. At this late stage in the game, they're not going to re-test me for GD. I still have bi-weekly nonstress tests (which she does perfectly on) and weekly ultrasounds. We'll talk induction at 39 weeks.

I have a lot of fears going into delivery. Because of the fluid and her size, I'm more likely a candidate for a C-section, so I need to come to terms that could happen if the induction doesn't work. It's definitely not what I want for several reasons, but at the end of the day, I just want our baby.

Symptom-wise, I'm struggling. While I'm not having noticeable contractions, everything else just hurts. I'm so heavy with such little ability to move anything but my arms. I'm also having the most incredible edema in my legs, ankles and feet. And it's NOW that I need to feel more energy and be more mobile as my to-do list isn't getting any shorter.

The To-Do List

• install car seat
• wash more of her clothes
• organize her clothes 
• buy more nursing tanks and a robe
• buy a traditional baby book
• pack hospital bags
• buy the video monitor and breast pump

I keep hoping that she'll decide to "move toward the light" on her own so I know that SHE is ready. C'mon, baby girl, we want to meet you!!

36 Weeks

It's getting harder and harder to believe it's almost time. In under 4 weeks my little girl will be here. We still have a lot of things to do yet (install the car seat, pack the bags, pick up things FOR the bags, wash things, put the swing together, etc.), so I'd prefer to wait until after that's all done.

This part of pregnancy has been the hardest for me. I'm just really uncomfortable and can barely do the minimum, like going to work and coming home. Any physical movement is a struggle, and I feel like a circus act whenever I'm out in public. I get stared at, smiled at, and constantly approached by strangers who want to comment on my size. And in addition to my elephant-like body, I've been having lots of swelling in my ankles and feet.

Last weekend we attended childbirth education class, which scared the bejeesus out of me. It made me just reconsider having her out altogether! While I did learn some tips, a part of me just wants to play things by ear and be coached by the clinicians. I also attended a breastfeeding class this week.

Wednesday I had an u/s to measure her fluid levels with an appointment with the OB right after. The levels went up, past the line of a condition called polyphadramnios. It could be a sign of absolutely nothing or it could be a sign of a birth defect/chromosomal abnormality. I have the option of a referral to a nearby hospital with a neonatal specialist, and I was sent immediately down to L&D for a nonstress test.  During the test, the midwife who was on call told me the baby looked great and that I shouldn't be worried about the fluid levels as I was just over the line. She has been the only one to be comforting and reassuring about this as the thought of something being wrong with Lucy makes me want to hide in the ground. I have another nonstress test scheduled for tomorrow and I'll have another u/s at my 38 week appointment. I just have to have faith that my baby is a big, strong healthy lady with no health problems. If she isn't 100% healthy, we'll tackle that at birth.

For now, I'll concentrate on the fact that Lucy has lots of hair as shown by the u/s this week -- long enough to float away from her head!

35 Weeks

35/35!!!  It seemed like this milestone would never happen! 


How far along?  35 weeks -- the size of a honeydew

Symptoms:  Pelvic pain, mild Braxton Hicks, pressure on bladder, sluggishness, heartburn

Total weight gain/loss:  +42

Maternity clothes? I'm now down to maybe 5 dresses that fit right. I stopped caring though. Ha.

Sleep:  Sucky. Still sleep in 1 to 2 hour increments on the couch.  

Best moment this week: Had my work shower yesterday! 

Movement:  She loves the nightlife. She's definitely more active at night, especially when I wake up to hang out with my husband between 11:30 - 1:30. The movements aren't too painful. Once in a while she'll get in a good jab that will take my breath away. Since she's dropped a bit, there's more pressure lower.

Food cravings:   Nothing in particular.

Gender:  Girl

Labor Signs:  No.

Belly Button in or out?  In. But it's really shallow/flat!!

What I miss:  Sleeping on my stomach, sleeping in my bed, cocktails, being comfortable, being able to go for more than 1 hour without an urgent need to pee...

What I am looking forward to:  Putting finishing touches on the nursery and getting all the essentials off the registeries. We're in full nesting mode in October!

Milestones:  The famous 35/35! 

34 Weeks

I had a growth ultrasound yesterday, and it's left me more confused than ever. According to the ultrasound, Lucy's clocking in at 5 lbs 11 oz, which is higher than average. Also, the amniotic fluid is higher than average as well. I have to have another ultrasound at my 36 week appointment and following I'll meet with the OB (I have been seen strictly by the midwives to this point.) I made the mistake of researching excessive fluid online, and the possible results have me terrified. I'm afraid I'll have to have a C-section. I'm afraid my water will break/gush so fast I'll have cord prolapse. I'm afraid even if she comes on her own time that she'll be so giant labor will be awful. I'm afraid that the fluid level is indicative of a birth defect -- that's my major concern. It's possible I'm completely blowing this out of proportion, but I don't need another unknown, another anxious thought in my head. I just want her to saunter out on her own time (before my due date) and be a perfectly healthy baby.

Also on the negative side of today's appointment, I'm up 9 lbs from the past 2 weeks, even though I have been consistently gaining 1 lb a week the past 4 weeks. I'm pretty sure most of that has to be water weight (my lower extremities are just now tree trunks), but still -- ugh. That's a total weight gain to date of 42 lbs. :(

On the PLUS side of the appointment -- we got to see her again via ultrasound! We saw her hiccup even! And this floored me -- she has HAIR. I was convinced she'd be a baldy like I was. I can't wait to see what color it is! From the u/s it just looks like little spiky fuzz.

I'm pretty confident she'll be here early, possibly in October. Time is ticking away so fast now. And I don't feel ready at all. A part of me wants to stay pregnant forever as crazy as that sounds! But so much of me just wants to be able to hold her in my arms and kiss her head and her chubby cheeks and breathe in the smell of her. I want to be her mommy in every way. But we'll need to have a chat about how she plans to make her entrance...

33 Weeks

Okay, when exactly did time speed up? Now instead of people saying "Ooh you have lots of time," it's now "Wow, so close!!" Ahhh! It seriously blows my mind that I could potentially have a baby next month. The mom-to-be anxiety is starting to hit. I feel like I just found out we're having a baby, even though I've known it for 7 months! Maybe it's because I now have time to think about really preparing for her. The past few months have been hectic with showers, weddings, out-of-town trips, conferences, photo shoots. But now it's nesting time. On the upcoming agenda - finishing off the nursery, packing the hospital bag, attending childbirth class, and squeezing in a fall mini maternity session. I'd also like to get one more pedi and perhaps a prenatal massage.

Even through all my anxiety over not being prepared and starting to think a little to much about labor, I really just can't wait to meet her. She's kind of like a little mystery right now. I know her sleep schedule and what makes her kick. I even know what she looks like to a point, but it's going to be completely different when she's on the outside. I just want to wrap my arms around her and love on her. Rubbing my belly just doesn't have the same effect.

Symptom-wise, I'm hanging in there. The pelvic pain is definitely still there. I really miss sleeping in beds. I'm a complete waddler, and I need to eat more frequent meals instead of larger meals. The heartburn I get at least twice a day. I've been having more ankle/feet swelling this week, but I could attribute that to walking around Philadelphia for three days.

People's comments continue to crack me up. During my conference last week, I had several women approach me and tell me not to go into labor that night. Errr, what? I was happily shoveling food in my face, not clutching my belly in agony! Do I really look like my water could break any minute? While I am big, she's so high up in my belly it doesn't seem like it could happen anytime soon.

32 Weeks

32 weeks, also known as 80% of the way there!

I used to think she'd make her arrival early, but now I'm not so sure. I think I need to prepare myself for an overdue baby so I don't hate my life if November 9 rolls around and she's still comfy in the womb. W thinks she'll be early based on her activity level -- "She wants out." Maybe I should start a pool. :)

Last Sunday Lucy finally broke free of the crazy position she found herself in last week. Thank GOD because oh my it hurt so bad. She's such a strong little girl. By Sunday I was practically crying out of frustration and pain. I have my fingers crossed she doesn't do anything similar or start doing the under-the-ribs kicks.

I made a tiny bit more progress on the nursery; After I put together the glider the other night, I sat there with my tank pushed up above my belly (klassy, I know) and just sat in amazement. There are so many times lately this all feels so surreal -- I've always thought about what it might be like to be pregnant and to be planning for a child, but now that I'm LIVING it... I still can't wrap my head around it. I can look down and see a visible pregnant body that is completely unfamiliar to me, and then I think about the result of this and it boggles my mind that much more. I'm going to be a mommy. Well, I AM a mommy now. I feel like a 13-year-old girl half the time, yet I'm going to have a daughter to raise in under two months. I have so many fears and anxieties about parenthood as I'm sure first-time moms often do. I try not to think about labor. I have to just hope that things go as well as can be and that Lucy and I remain healthy throughout.

I have a busy week ahead of me which include being a bridesmaid at an out of town wedding, going out of town a few days later for a conference, and then having my family/friends shower the next day. If my body can make it through all this excitement, I'll be amazed and grateful! I've really slowed down now and walking more than 20 steps is just plain annoying. I feel like all my organs are pushed together up to my throat. But through it all, I am enjoying pregnancy -- quite the contradiction, huh? Because I know that my days are numbered with it being just me and Lucy, where I don't have to share her with anyone. Selfish, yes. But I hear that's a trait common in moms. :)

Bump Progress to Date

31 Weeks

How far along?  31 weeks – the size of a head of lettuce.

Symptoms:  Frequent bathroom trips, sluggishness, mild back aches, heartburn, fatigue, some shortness of breath like my lungs are being crowded up against other organs

Total weight gain/loss:  +31

Maternity clothes? Yes and having a need to buy bigger maternity clothes! I'm trying to make do with what I have because in the scheme of things, 9 more weeks doesn't warrant the cost.

Sleep:  Poor as usual. I sleep on the couch in 2 hour increments. 

Best moment this week:  Had a nice Labor Day with my husband. It wasn't anything too out of the norm, but being able to share some relaxing moments with him is probably going to be few and far between when Lucy arrives.

Movement:  She's been a little off her normal schedule. Not a lot of movement Tuesday, but tons of all day movement Wednesday and Thursday. She's still a night owl. And now her movements are starting to hurt -- she'll stick out a foot or butt and leave it there! 

Food cravings:   Nothing in particular.

Gender:  Girl

Labor Signs:  No.

Belly Button in or out?  In. Though I'm sure everyone thinks I've popped; I have this old scar from when I removed my navel ring that juts out a bit right above my belly button.

What I miss:  Sleeping on my stomach, sleeping in my bed, cocktails, being comfortable, being able to go for more than 1 hour without an urgent need to pee...

What I am looking forward to:  Making some more progress in the nursery (the dresser should be arriving soon!) and VERY excited for my family/friends baby shower in two weeks, too.

Milestones:  Single digit weeks til my due date!! I'm now at the point where it seems just around the corner in a lot of ways. 

In other news, I'm clearly unprepared for baby according my overdue Bump tasks. :( 

30 Weeks

Three-quarters of the way to meeting my baby girl! Apparently she's the size of a cabbage. I'm guessing she's around 3 lbs by now. Based on what I saw at the 4D ultrasound, 2 lbs of her are her cheeks. :)

I had my 30 week midwife appointment today. I'm still measuring at 30, which puts me right on track. (I was measuring at 30 two weeks ago as well.) I put on 2 more lbs for a grand total of 31 lbs at 30 weeks. Her heartbeat is at 140 and the midwife also believes she's head down now.

No new symptoms. I'm still battling the round ligament pain and constant peeing. I move like an elephant in slow motion, and when I'm on my back, I'm definitely a turtle who's landed on her shell. I get swollen ankles and feet when I'm doing a lot of walking.

We really haven't made much nursery progress other than getting the rug. My dad is coming over this weekend to help me hang curtain rods, and then I'll be testing out some curtains. We're also going to try finding her, and maybe us, a dresser.

We have our maternity session coming up on Sunday, and I'm so anxious. I set really high expectations for myself when I book a pro shoot, and I spent three hours in the mall tonight trying to find a new dress with absolutely no luck. I hate when I have a vision that I can't make work. So I'm going to try to use what I have. I'm also coming equipped with lots of different props, so maybe that will disguise any poor choices in wardrobe I make.

Invites arrived today for my baby shower which will be in three weeks! 

29 Weeks

Almost out of the 20s! Somehow being in your 30-some weeks seems a lot more closer. Also, baby is the size of a butternut squash.

Because pregnancy seems to have brought on adult ADHD, here's another random list of thoughts/things that happened during the past week.

• We went to my favorite amusement park last weekend, but it was like 80% less fun being pregnant. Between all the bathroom trips, elephant walking, only riding two rides.... blech. The only thing that got me through was the thought we'd be pushing around our (outside) baby next year.
• Had my first baby shower Sunday (details and photos in last blog post.)
• Attended a physical therapy class for pregnant women Monday, where we learned how to prevent back pain through better posture and little exercises. Also talked about pelvic floor/bladder issues. I definitely learned a few things (like how to log roll out of bed which is preventing a lot of my round ligament pain squeals), but I still can't get the right posture down! 
• Made some very minor progress on the nursery. I really need our schedules to chill out a bit for a few weeks so I can get some more done. I think I know what rug we're getting. I'm testing out a pair of curtains soon, and I'm ordering the crib skirt. Dresser hunting continues at actual furniture stores hopefully tomorrow. 
• Also tomorrow? 4D ULTRASOUND! I'm so nervous. While I can't wait to get a better peek at our little girl, I've always been one to get creeped out by these ultrasounds because they can look so distorted. With any luck, I'll be able to post some photos tomorrow night!! 

Getting started on photo session outfits and props. :)

28 Weeks

Highlights of the past week

• Baby girl attended her first bridal shower and bachelorette party! Though I did have to tell her she won't be attending another b-party until she's 21. ;) I had a minor freakout when I thought the loud music/bass was keeping her up and active too long (parenting is going to be soooo mentally exhausting!), but I was then reassured she was most likely bouncing around in the womb, having a blast. 
• I signed us up for our Saturday childbirth class -- we go in early October. The bad part about that is it's 7 hours long! 
• I took my one-hour glucose test -- and passed! I don't know why, but I had convinced myself I was going to fail it and/or be diagnosed with GD. Bullet dodged. Pass the cookies.
• But I should maybe pass on cookies, considering I went up another 7 lbs this month. OMG. I'm now a total of 29 pounds up from starting weight. Surprisingly I'm not freaking out. Yes, I could make healthier choices, but I believe my body is going to do what it's going to do to grow this child. Weight can always be lost. 
• More progress made on the nursery, i.e. there's a freaking CRIB in my house!!! It's so surreal. I guarantee I'll be spending a lot of time in her nursery just staring in amazement that soon there'll be a little girl in it. Blows my mind a little more each day. 

Me, baby, and the beautiful bachelorette!

CRIB!

27 Weeks

I REALLY don't want to whine again, especially because part of this blog's purpose is to serve as documentation for my daughter to read someday, but it's really had to put a positive spin on the past week. To put it bluntly, I've been a miserable, sad sack of a pregnant woman. The aches, pains, rampant bladder problems, combined with body image issues ... it's been messing with me mentally. And I hate it. I hate being down because of pregnancy. I want to focus on what's ahead and the tiny little baby who is living in my uterus, depending on me for everything. But I'm trapped in my own head, fervently wishing I could hit the fast forward button to November.

And then the guilt comes. Because as sucky as the negative parts are, I don't want to rush this. Like I said before, this is a very epic period in my life, and I don't want to wish it away. I always knew that the latter half of my pregnancy would be a little more cruel since first tri was such a breeze.

But the good news? We've hit the third trimester! (Most sites say 3rd tri begins at 27 weeks, so that's what I'm going with.) Third tri will be full with many events -- showers, weddings, my baby showers -- and things like finishing her nursery, getting maternity photos done, attending childbirth class ... it will be busy for sure!

How far along? 27 weeks

Total weight gain: 22 lbs as of 3 weeks ago.

Maternity clothes? Basically everything is maternity now. Sadly I've sized out of some of my early maternity clothes. :( 

Stretch marks? No new ones anyway!

Sleep: Still sleeping on the couch every night. I can sleep soundly and comfortably until the mother nature calls. 

Best moment this week: Making it to third tri 

Miss Anything? Pre-pregnancy body that didn't hurt, a cold beer, dresses with waistlines

Movement: Lots of movement. Baby girl is active. I think she's been taking in too much Olympics -- she likes to use my uterus for her floor mat routine.

Food cravings: The past few weeks I've had cravings for turkey BLT sandwiches.

Anything making you queasy or sick: No.

Gender: Girl :) 

Labor Signs: None. 

Symptoms: Heartburn, constant need to pee, round ligament pain

 Belly Button in or out? In.

Wedding rings on or off? I bought a fake diamond ring a few weeks ago because my wedding band was getting tight. 

Happy or Moody most of the time: This week? Very moody. 

Looking forward to: Seeing college friends this weekend to celebrate the upcoming nuptials of one of my bests. 

Bare Bump 26w2d + Closet Progress

26 Weeks

Looks like my last week of 2nd trimester!

This week baby girl must have had a growth spurt -- I noticed a decent change in bump size, plus I've been getting ravenously hungry between 10 pm and 1 am. She's been getting more feisty around 3:30-4:30 with kicking. And while I haven't had specific food cravings most of 2nd trimester, the past two weeks I've been really into turkey BLT sandwiches.

Also this past week we've made a minor dent in nursery preparations. We've mostly cleared out all the stuff from the second bedroom and found innovative ways to combine closet space. Friends have graciously helped me paint the trim, walls and closets. I have lots to do yet to finish those basics, but we're very sloooowly getting somewhere. The crib is purchased but still in the box. I'll definitely need to call in the reinforcements to help us since we're assembly challenged in a big way! The next two weekends will be completely full between traveling and other outings, so I really want to accomplish a lot this weekend. Maybe the nesting phase is kicking in?

Another thing we can check off our pre-baby checklist is visiting her future daycare. It's close to our home and one of the few places that offer half day hours. While I'm not gaga over the very dated building and tattered equipment, I'm reminded by other moms it's the care that matters.

In other news, we found out that our baby will have a built-in family bestie -- W's sister and brother-in-law had their anatomy scan today and found out they're having a girl too! I think it will be sweet to see the two together at family functions.

25 Weeks

25 down, 15 to go!

Baby girl is getting more and more active, I've noticed the past week. She must be running out of room because she's not shy about doing entire gymnastics routines inside my belly. Last Sunday she didn't take any breaks during the day!

No new symptoms. Getting out of a sitting or reclining position is tough work, and I completely dread stairs and hills. I'm trying to work more veggies into my diet. I have this fear I'm going to turn up positive for gestational diabetes (I take my first test in about two weeks).

We're finally making some progress on the nursery! The biggest hurdle was getting our old guest bed out of the house, but it's done! My bestie came over to help me freshen up the trim. Next on the agenda is putting a fresh coat of paint on the walls and touching up the ceiling. Eventually, once hubby's clothes are out of the closets, we may paint the insides of the closet pink. I thought about doing a striped wall, but I'm chickening out a bit. And hopefully we're buying the crib this weekend!! I'm still on the hunt for a dresser; my goal is find one on Craiglist and paint it. I think I'll feel a lot more settled once the nursery starts shaping up.

24 Weeks

Happy Viability Day! (though she better stay comfy for another couple months!)

So as much as I complained last week, I'm really trying to concentrate on the positives. I don't want to spend too much of this pregnancy miserable; I really want to enjoy it cherish the times I get to spend with my daughter as close to me as humanly possibly as it gets! Some day I'll look back on this time and wish I could have it back. I'll still kvetch about the crazy pregnancy symptoms and irritants, but I won't wallow in them.

I crossed off a major (to me) pre-baby checklist item when I finally got ahold of the daycare I want to find out there's no waiting list. We tour at the end of the month! I'm hoping we like what we see, because we really don't have a lot of options when it comes to daycares who offer part-time hours.

No new symptoms this week. She's pretty active all the time, especially in the wee hours of the morning as I'm struggling to fall back asleep. Fruit and carbs really get her going.

I had my 24 week appointment today. Looks like I'm up 20 pounds. I can't say I'm surprised; my mom and my sister both gained over 50 with each of their pregnancies, so I'm probably just following nature here. I have to remember it's only temporary and I will do my best to lose it. The better news is she's measuring on track and her heartbeat is in the 130s.

Last weekend I picked up more things at yard sales. At this rate, she'll have way too many clothes, but I figure it's always good to have backups. :) Now if I could just pry myself away from Etsy.

23 Weeks

Disclaimer: The below will sound whiny and bratty, but sometimes a pregnant girl just has to complain about the crap parts of pregnancy. Don't get me wrong -- I'm thrilled to be pregnant and be a grower of life and all that jazz I swear. But it's not all puppies and rainbows.

I miss being able to sleep in my bed. I miss being able to haul myself out of a sitting position without time and grunts and heavy breathing. I miss not four hour stretches of sleep. I miss fruity cocktails and beer. I miss not having heartburn and random pains in my belly. I miss having non-swollen legs and feet. I miss not feeling like I'm not an elephant who slowly trudges wherever it goes. I miss the days when people didn't have carte blanche to talk about my weight. I miss not being judged/judging myself for what foods/drinks I put into my body.

But worst of all is the knowledge that I have soooo many more weeks to go and that all of the above will just get worse and then some. I'm already growing out of some of my maternity clothes -- like, how is that even possible at 23 weeks?!

Planning wise, I feel like I'm falling behind. I haven't been able to get in touch with the daycare I'm interested in. The guest room is still not cleaned out, not painted, no furniture purchased. I have two registered started, butt they're not completed. I haven't scheduled my childbirth classes yet. Why is it time slowed down when about my physical discomforts, but seems like it's zipping by when I think about all the baby prep?

Baby is the size of a large mango! She's getting more active in the days, but she's especially feisty at night right before I want to sleep.

22 Weeks

Baby is as long as a spaghetti squash! (I have never looked at a spaghetti squash, but I'm assuming it's a good size.) 

I've never really done any of these pregnancy surveys on the blog before, but there's a first for everything, right? 

How far along? 22 weeks

Total weight gain: 14 lbs as of 2 weeks ago.

Maternity clothes? Pretty much everything I wear is maternity at this point. A lot of my dresses would work, but they rise up too far in front and look ridic.

Stretch marks? No new ones anyway!

Sleep: Decent only when I'm on the couch. I wish I could sleep in my bed, but nothing seems to work; it's just too uncomfortable. When I'm on the couch I feel supported, plus I'm still able to lie on my back. I can lie like a stone until my bladder wakes me up. 

Best moment this week: I should write these down, but alas, the pregnancy brain has struck again. 

Miss Anything? Belly sleeping. And fruity alcoholic drinks. Like whoa.

Movement: Kicks and tumbles -- always after I eat and usually right before bedtime. 

Food cravings: No real strong craving. We eat a lot of pizza. And salads at lunch during the week. (I've taken to speaking for her -- is that creepy?) 

Anything making you queasy or sick: No.

Gender: Girl :) 

Labor Signs: None. 

Symptoms: Clumsiness, loss of memory retention, swollen ankles/feet, heartburn

 Belly Button in or out? In.

Wedding rings on or off? Wearing just my e-ring these days.

Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy definitely. 

Looking forward to: Purging the guest room to make it into the nursery!

21 Weeks

Baby is as long as a carrot! But there are like a million different carrot sizes, so I'll go with the "Dad's Pregnancy Guide" which says length of a beer bottle.

Over the halfway point! Last week I felt like time was going by too quickly, and "zomg, not enough time to prepare!" Now? It's "If I'm this giant at 21 weeks, what happens at 36?!" I hate even worrying about it because it's so shallow, and I know it's temporary and to grow my little girl, but it just makes me feel uncomfortable now. To top it off, I'm definitely noticing foot and ankle swelling. Granted, it's 95 and humid, but I can SEE how swollen they are. If only I could get away with wearing flip-flops everyday to work! 

I've been hitting up some yard sales the past week to see what kind of good baby things I can get my hands on. Clothes are easy enough (and I doubt she'll ever want for something pretty to wear in this house), but now I'm looking for baby gear that I wouldn't mind being used.

I feel her a lot more this week. Especially after I eat and every time I switch positions during the night. A night owl already - oh boy! We call her a little soccer star.

I also crossed something off my pregnancy checklist -- scheduling our maternity session! I'm super excited to work with the Cardens again. I've already created a big pinboard of maternity session inspiration.

We're getting closer to confirming her name, which I can't wait to reveal! 

20 Weeks

Baby is the size of a banana!

Ohmygosh, my baby girl is half baked!! What an epic week -- between finding out she's a healthy lady and seeing her move around on the monitor, and now knowing we're at the halfway point -- it's just unbelievable. Admittedly I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed; she'll be here before I know it, and I'm astounded at all the preparing we have to do. I'm wading into uncharted territory in so many ways. Perhaps I need to calm my brain by making some lists and getting organized. Can any moms out there tell me it's normal to feel this in over my head?

I'm pretty easily getting used to the idea of having a daughter. Once I got over my initial shock (and a little bit of grieving for the little boy I imagined), I'm growing more and more thrilled. Everyone keeps telling me I was meant to have a little girly girl like me, though a friend joked that she may be a complete tomboy and detest dresses. (as if!) Plus I'm realizing I *know* little girls so much better than boys. I have a ton of nieces, plus well, I'm a girl. And now that we're so close to confirming her name (first, anyway), she's becoming an actual *person* to me. I'm sure this little lady will have her daddy wrapped around her finger as soon as she makes her debut. I've watched how W interacts with my bff's baby girl (exhibt A), and I know their relationship will be something amazing.

This morning on my way to work I stopped by a neighbor's yard sale and while rummaging through the girls clothes I had another revelation of "Wow, I have a little girl on the way. She'll wear these clothes!" The magnitude of all this is really coming at me this week.

Symptom-wise, no real cravings except the salads at lunch one. My bump is getting bigger, higher, and harder. I've been feeling movement off and on, which I'm thankfully getting used to. I feel like a cow in everything I wear, so I worry what the next 20 weeks will do to my body (especially considering I'm already up 14 lbs -- she only weighs 12 oz right now!) Sleep is getting marginally better now that I'm getting used to side sleeping.

Who knows -- maybe I'll be able to unveil a name soon. :)

19 Weeks

Baby is the size of a mango!

After four weeks of awful sleep, I finally had a decently restful night in my bed last night! I'm hoping for that trend to continue. As I suspected, my ever growing size is having quite the effect on my movement and body position.

Food-wise, and I'm super happy about this, I've been REALLY enjoying salads everyday for lunch in the cafeteria. I'm a "dry salad" eater, so salads generally don't hold the same appeal for me as others, but OMG they taste so good to me right now. I'm really hoping this sticks around. I haven't fed me or this baby very well the past four months. (Sorry, kid.)

Yesterday was my 31st birthday. I just kept thinking "Next year we'll have a baby to help celebrate with!" or the thought of "The only birthday I care about this year will happen in November..." Plus I'm way more excited about June 20 (our anatomy scan) than anything. And I can't wait to finally get serious about buying some baby gear/clothes/nursery things. I don't want to go crazy right away since my friends and family are throwing me a shower, but now W and I will know which side of the baby clothes aisle to look in!