4w5d

Today marks 4w5d and still no nausea -- which is good, don't get me wrong, but the sadistic part of it me wants a bit of it because it would reinforce a growing embryo. I have the typical 4-5 week symptoms: lots of fatigue (I think about my cushy bed once an hour) and swollen boobs. I've cut my caffeine intake by half, upped my fruit and veggie intake, and dutifully take my prenatals. I wish that I could be doing more, so I'll probably start walking around my neighborhood after work once the weather gets a little warmer.

Nope, not a baby bump.

I research a lot. It helps in a weird way to hear from other paranoid 1st trimester gals and compare symptoms and fears. I think about being pregnant constantly. I suppose that's a normal reaction to something this life-changing, but I know that not everyone needs to hear about it constantly.

I've always had a pouchy lower tummy area -- even at my thinnest in high school and then again in 2009. I've been convinced that everyone in the world suspects I've been knocked up for a year now. A shallow part of me wishes I was "out" so that I could stick out my bloaty belly with pride. But no. What looks like a baby bump is actually a food bump. Plus some newly added 1st tri bloating. I'm bound to get even more curious looks now.

I want to tell everyone I know about this, but holy crap, I'm not even 5 weeks in. Most women don't even KNOW they're pregnant this stage in the game. And as much as I'd love to start picking up baby items and maternity clothes, I'm afraid I'll jinx everything once I do!  Yes, it's illogical, but welcome to my brain. I've already come to terms that I'll be a crazy pregnant lady. My poor husband.